WHY JUNK FOOD IS BAD FOR US

Do you think junk food is bad for children? Well, indeed it is. Some would wonder why but no one can deny the fact that junk food is really bad for us. It makes us fat, and even worse, it can lead us to obesity if we don't control ourselves. They consist of bad elements that are artificial and are high in cholesterol. Just take Sally in the story as an example. She habitually eats junk food and now she is overweight. Thus, junk food is really bad for us especially for children. Parents should look after their kids and consider monitoring their health.

FEEBACK:

Thank you very much for submitting your homework. The way you wrote your paragraph is so personalized that it feels like you're just talking to me. Whatever point of view you want to use is okay as long as you use it correctly. However, please avoid using too much period even when it's no longer necessary. The following are the things I want you to study:

1. Please study how to properly use punctuation marks.
2. Your introduction is always okay but please know how to smoothly end your paragraph. It should have beginning, middle and end. :)